As we reach double digits in this year’s advent calendar it may not have escaped your attention that there is a general election looming in our near future, and if, like me, you’ve been ploughing through the news reports and watching the seemingly endless leadership debates, you could be forgiven for letting the odd expletive out in sheer frustration about the whole horrendous mess that we have found ourselves in. Worry not however as The Joyzine Advent Calendar has your back – we’ve assembled a pair of punk’s most proficient purveyors of political profanity to do the swearing for you.
First up are Blackpool math-punks Those Fucking Snowflakes, potential winners of this year’s best named single for their recent track ‘Vegan Sausage Rolls vs Gammon Faced Vampires’ (which comes with an excellent video).
They’ve recorded their own re-written version of a well-worn festive favourite, which we’re delighted to unveil as an exclusive on this year’s calendar. We’ll let the band introduce it themselves:
Originally we were going to do ‘Happy Christmas (War Is Over)’ but we ran out of time to learn and record it, so with the election coming up we decided to slam out a cover of ‘Last Christmas’ by Wham! but with our own lyrics, focused on exactly what we think of Boris Johnson and why he and his gang of snakes need kicking out of power.
We headed to our practice room above a pub in Blackpool town centre on Weds 4th December and set about learning and recording the song. It was all recorded live on our 8 track digital recorder with one guitar overdub and we managed it on the 16th take, by that point BP’s vocals were broken and CS’ arms tired from drumming.
BP, the singer, is taking part in Whamageddon so refused to listen to the original song before re-writing the lyrics. The new ones don’t quite fit, but Boris Johnson doesn’t quite fit in the role of Prime Minister so it works.
The live track was kindly mixed and mastered by Kev at Rec Blackpool. for FREEEE.
Download ‘Last Election by Wham!’ (right click to download)
Part two of our electoral expletive special comes from Foxcunt, who we last crossed paths at this year’s Top of the Alcopops all-dayer. The band released their debut album A Visit from Foxcunt in October (available via Bandcamp), and today we’re bringing you their Christmas single ‘Merry Christmas, Fuck The Patriarchy’. In the bands own words:
Is there anything more festive than smashing the system? Foxcunt are ringing in the season with their brand new single, ‘Merry Christmas, Fuck The Patriarchy’. At just under a minute long, it doesn’t outstay its welcome – unlike the last few thousand years of structural oppression! Here’s to a cider-fuelled Christmas and an anarcho-syndicalistic New Year!
Download ‘Merry Christmas, Fuck The Patriarchy’ (right click to download)
PS – despite our grumpy intro, please do make sure that you get out and vote on Thursday. A list of candidates standing in your constituency can be found on the Electoral Commission website and you now have a soundtrack for your walk to the polling station.
All of the tracks on The Joyzine Advent Calendar are completely free to download without any need to sign up, and if that fills you with the spirit of giving, why not make a donation to our chosen charity Crisis to help with the excellent work they do supporting homeless people in Britain.
Check back every day until Christmas Eve for more free festive musical gifts or check the links below to catch up on what you may have missed so far.
Day One: Oh! Gunquit
Day Two: Vodun
Day Three: West Midlands
Day Four: Peter With Rosie, Hey You Guys!, Peter Richard Adams + Evilwitch
Day Five: Mask
Day Six: The Son Fathers
Day Seven: Ariel Sharratt & Mathias Kom + 22-Pistepirkko
Day Eight: The Melting Ice Caps
Day Nine: Extradition Order